strlghtrhapsody

I don't understand why the body needs 8+ hours to function at a normal, healthy level. It seems like such a waste of time yet without it the body drains of energy and your immunity decreases.

So let's do some math.

 

Say that you are the average American individual and you work 9 hour days and say you sleep 8 hours. Out of your 24 hour day you waste 17 hours working and sleeping. The rest of the time is spent on household chores, driving to and from work, and getting prepped for work. But I'm just bitching because I seem to never have the time to do anything!

I've been trying to lose weight and I've come to the conclusiong that with my schedule it's near impossible. I'm exhausted all the time, between work, sitting my nephew, and school. I'm just ready to kill over. But I'm hoping to lose at least 50 pounds by the end of the year... that's the minimum. I really need to stay on the straight and narrow.

I danced for about 15 minutes today- enough to break into a dance and ache in my legs and hips. I promise to run through the neighborhood tomorrow.

But if you think of my food, it was terrible, I probably ate 2400 calories in food.

I would have worked out more but I'm just so fucking tired...

x_x

Story time!

My friend and I were cruising the internet just now and she has became an obsessive fan of "In This Moment".  I will now give you a bit of their works here:
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Not to terrible right?
Well, she was curious if they would be on tour in America and they are but they will be the opening act for a much more frightening band. They call themselves "Mudvayne".----------->http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7DWH3DrzeY
I was terribly disturbed when I saw this video! It brought back images of a childhood I'd rather forget! With things like IT and gradvoids sneaking up on me the last thing I want to watch is demonic clowns roaring into mics... 

O.O

Reasons for being M.I.A. and further rants. Enjoy!

So, few of you have probably been wondering where the hell I’ve been for the past few months (and for those of you who aren’t… oh well, deal with my rant!).

I had a birthday on the 8^th (22^nd, so old! x.x) and took a journey to the Baltimore Maryland Harbor. While there, I made a stop at the aquarium where I viewed all the tanks and even got to see the dolphin show. I’ll post a few of the pictures from the show and a few of the strange looking animals I had the chance to see! Even though the dolphins were awe-inspiring my favorite tank was the underwater viewing center where you could view the rays, a nurse shark, and a logger-headed turtle swimming with soft music playing in the background. Something about the dark atmosphere reflecting fractured light through the rippling currents soothed me.

After leaving the harbor, my friend and I got lost and found this awesome mall (Arundel Mills). It was equipped with an Egyptian-styled movie theater (The Muvico) and the most amazing entertainment center I’ve ever seen: Dave and Buster’s. To put it simply… D&B’s is the adults’ version of a Chucky Cheese; full arcade, nice alcoholic beverages, and a loaded bowling alley.

I’ve started back to school (woo hoo!) and I plan on staying motivated. Every day that I am in Virginia seems to eat at my sanity- I can’t stand it here. I can’t stand the drama and irritation that is brought on by my family. Don’t get me wrong, I love them all, but I need my own space. I need a place of my own where I can stretch out on the floor and not have to worry about someone tripping over me. The aggravation is only complete when it comes to viewing the lifestyle that my aunt has chosen- allowing her parasitic daughter’s boyfriend to feed off our funds. I hate him.

I have also stumbled across some amazing artists! Check them out now our I’ll kick you!

• Nightwish
• Within Temptation
• Epica
• Sireina

More to come in the music department.

I have just finished reading a very awesome series over my winter break. The author, Vickie Pettersson, is classified as an urban fantasy author but her ideas are amazing. Minus the vampires and werewolves she weaves of story of magic and destiny where her main character (Joanna Archer) is conflicted by her dual natures of Light and Dark. I highly recommend this series to all who enjoy urban fantasy but would like something a little fresher.

It always seems I make promises to myself to get on here and blog more often... or pull out my ratty journal that's well over 15 years old... or take time to myself to read and write and do what I want to do.

No matter what the promise is, I always end up breaking it.

Christmas is a few days away and I lack the normal excitement I feel toward the occasion.  I wouldn't call it an unhappy emotion... it's just that I'm dreading it.  Not the presents or the exchanges or the grumbles about incorrect gifts.  I'm dreading the task of having to sit down with my family and attempt to enjoy myself for a few hours.
How could anyone expect me to remain composed as I sit across from the bane of my existence?  How many times have I tried to escape this hell hole only to fail?
Not that life has been all that miserable, just when it comes to the family situation.



School was a relative success.  Why do I say relative?  Because I FAILED the second part of my advanced dual mathematics course.  A little intense and more than demanding, I refused to give my professor the satisfaction of consuming my every waking moment with raw math problems.  I failed but I'll just have to retake the second course ocne again.

With another math professor...

I have been very blessed this Christmas.  I have recieved multiple gifts from everyone that I feel really loves me and I am thankful for that.  I am going to head off to hallmark tomorrow (SCARY!) and buy Christmas cards for everyone. These people include:

Linda D.
Kristie C.
Cappy S.
Ciera J.
Rahcel R.

I'm also going to try to keep up with this site!  Ah!  Wish me luck!

As you can tell life has been CRAZY!  I wish I had the time and energy to expend to get on the few online websites I belong to and update but... life just gets in the way.  I barely have time to read and write anymore.  I envy everyone who doesn't have to work fulltime while attending college.  It BLOWS!

Well, I have just finished the Twilight saga by Stephanie Meyer... I'll tell you my personal feelings on the entire thing at a later date (I always make these promises and nothing never seems to come of them...)

Nicole has moved back in with the family after being gone for one year... she has a tag along as well in the form of some wretched creature that we call Lee.  Is it disgusting that I fantasize about the twenty different ways to torture him?  I despise him, he disgusts me, he makes me want to vomit and tear something apart.  It's horrible that someone eo insignificant in the fabric of my life can create such horrid reactions from me.  But I guess that's one of the biggest perks about being emotionally unstable.

After carefl thought I've decided that once I have medical insurance I will go to the doctor and discuss medication opitions with him.  I'm getting to the point that if a few Xanex's or Zolofts will help me get through the day why should I torture myself with all this emotional suffering?  Not to sound angsty or suicidal... lol~

writ·er's block   (rī'tərz)
n.   A usually temporary psychological inability to begin or continue work on a piece of writing.

In another forum on another site, I created a thread about the above stated subject and people are really pissing me off!  Some tell me they do not suffer from such things because they have already created every tiny plot marker, twist, and ending while others tell me it is procrastination and laziness.

Are people idiots or what?

And they really piss me off!  I mean, ignorance, arrogance, and the thought that they are superior over all of us 'underlings'.  If you're so freakin' great, why are you posting on a NON-PROFIT FUCKING SITE AND NOT IN A MAGAZINE?!!???!?!? HUH?  HUH HUH!?

Yes, I admit, I post my BS online but do I put what I really consider my literary genius out on the web?

 

Fucking hell no.  You're stupid to put anything you may one day want to have published into cyber space because it can, and will, be STOLEN! DUUUUUH you idiots!!!
 

Of course, it's been a bad week, a rough week, an uncertain week.  And the last thing I want someone telling me is that my/anyone's writer's block is a form of laziness.

If you never suffer from writer's block than I simply say this: a) you haven't been writing long enough to realize that your 'amazing' ideas have been recycled repeatedly, or b) you write a very born, bland mix.  Writer's block is part of bringing creativity out.

So up yours, asshole.

*growl*

With the start of school of been extremely busy but I have found that my creative mind seems to be over active after years of reaming dormant.  It's refreshing and reassuring the my mind hasn't turned to slush after working at a medical facility about as stimulating as watching leaves fall from a tree.

In the next few months my schedule is going to be pretty tight in regards to my free time, but that's partially my own fault for scheduling so many different activities around one another.  This month, on the 27th, my friends and I are going to the National Book Festival in Washington, DC where I'll get to meet some of the greatest authors (aka Neil Gaiman!!!).  Tomorrow, I've been invited to a party, next week I have two dinner arrangements, and the month of october is filled with literary excitement!  I'll keep you posted until that time!

Plus, I've got math homework out the ying-yang.

Well, my little friends, school is in full swing and it's official!

I'm a FULL TIME STUDENT!!!

Haha, that's right.  I've cut my hours at work so that I would be able to attend my local Community College full time and, hopefully, transfer to a four year college in the future.  I'm excited but I am quite rusty in the studying/school work area and my head is starting to hurt again.  Stress?  Probably.

But it'll be worth it in the end... at least that's what I keep telling myself!  *fingers cross*

As I've said, my goal is to be a writer (you should see the sneers and cynical smirks whenever I mention my intention of writing!) and I've sniffed around at the big names.  Harper Collin's and Penguin both do interns for people interested in publishing and editing, so even if I have to work my way up, I'll make it there eventually, and that's what it's all about.

On to other things...

I have found a secret love for Imogen Heap, a dancy and techno chick.  I'm really enjoying her song 'The Walk'.  It's very inspirational.

Where do you search for inspiration?  Is it from what you hear?  What you see?  Do you find inspiration through the images that swirl and tumble in disarray within your mind?  Let me know!

Until next time~

 

A

It seems almost impossible to find the energy to write anything worth a shit.  After working ten hours at the office, I find it hard to articulate my imagination and, quite frankly, I'm getting sick and tired of the shit I have to put up with.  I miss the days of bullshitting around when I could come home, pull up an empty document and feed the greedy space with my eager thoughts.

In the event that I should find a surge of creative energy, I'll share what comes out of it.  The majority of it seems to be dark and, well, angsty, I guess?  Though I never thought of myself as an overly emotional writer, just a bitch that wants a little vengence.

Maybe I'll start dicking around with my coworkers.

School starts in under two weeks *shudder*

Luck to me! 

So, in the past few months, I've done quite a bit of traveling and I love it!!

By default, I've been a creature who has always been on the go.  When I was younger, I can remember my mother packing my brother and I into a vehicle and cruising to Virginia to see my cousins.  When I took up residence with my aunt, our routine every Friday and Saturday night consisted of getting into the van after school and going to the mall where we ate a calorie choked meal and wasted five dollars at the arcade.  During the summer, we were found loitering the beach, crashing along with the waves and getting sand in every crevice of our body or in the cool climates of Davenport where mountains challenge even the most intense of climbers.

Since the days of signing on as a full time employee and going to school, my fingers have been pretty tied, especially since my dream is to express myself through the words I write, I want to become a weaver of the imagination.  In short, a writer.

But, at the beginning of this summer, since spotting Pullman at an author signing, of taken a lot of time off and said 'fuck it' to a lot of things.  You only live once, and what is the purpose in living if you only continue to see the same things day in and day out?  I wanted to see something fresh, something vibrant and beautiful, so different.  

Since that fateful day in June, I have gone to Indianna, Maryland, and South Carolina.  I have travelled through multiple states, I have seen many things, and I want to see more, taste more, experience more.   I want to live a life in which I cannot allow myself to think 'damn, why didn't I take the chance and just... do it?'.  Not that I don't understand life is filled with regrets and missed chances, but grasp at everything you can, make everything count.

"Live today fully and you create a lifetime of meaningful memories"

Paramore: Riot
Forever the Sickest Kids: Underdog Alma Mater
Sarah Brightman: Sympony
                          Gothica/Fleurs Du Mal
The Spill Canvas: No Really, I'm fine
Amethystium: Isabliss